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Ever thought about being dominated?

13th March 2016 - 9:22 | London UK, London | Age 34

So, what do you do if you have these thoughts and feelings, or have even indulged them?
Naturally, the fact that you enjoy them, or think you would, and others consider them weird, makes you feel guilty, embarassed and ashamed at your own desires, which then starts to eat away at your confidence, self esteem and self worth.

Most just try to suppress them and think they'll pass, which they don't, and others turn to therapy, to try and "fix" themselves. Now, I don't know how many achieve success with that but, it tends to follow the same course. Find your issue, face it, and overcome it.

But often it tries to do this by attacking the wrong target. It tries to stop you from wanting the things you enjoy because of the guilt and shame you feel about them and, as anyone with strong needs and desires will tell you, this is an uphill, if not futile, battle. If you feel happy and fufilled on your knees, with your hair firmly grasped in someones fist and a cock hitting the back of your throat and choking you, then telling you it's wrong, and trying to help you understand why you like it, isn't going to help you much. In fact it will have your head spinning so fast that you cant wait to feel that firm grip holding you still again and giving you the clarity and simplicity you crave.

Accept the present and figure out how to enjoy the future. So, instead of trying to prevent you from thinking or doing the things you might enjoy, that then make you feel guilty, why not simply encourage you to enjoy them and just stop feeling ashamed about it? Why not attack the guilt and shame instead of the thoughts or actions? Why not teach you that your somewhat fucked up sexual feelings and desires are in fact perfectly ok, and that as long as no harm comes to you and you cause no harm to others, then have at it and enjoy yourself and feel good about it.

Lots of women enjoy rough, dominant sex, the most common female fanstasies involve being taken by force. Of course they all think they're the only one that feels that way and so there must be something wrong with them, but they're not, and there isn't.

Maybe there are reasons why you feel that way and need it so much, but do you want to spend the rest of your life ashamed, crying yourself to sleep, wondering why you have such extreme desires and whether you can change them? Or would you prefer to simply be able to enjoy them as fully as possible, without the slightest feeling of guilt?

If you enjoy the idea of being tied up, spanked, caned, thrown around, fucked aggressively and treated like a sex toy, then so what. If you believe you'd prefer a relationship where someone else calls the shots, takes control and makes decisions for you, then big deal, it's your life.

You want to submit and accept authority from someone you can trust, see, smell, hear, taste and touch. Someone who's yours, who you can see cares about you and you alone, who you can please in tangible ways.

If you've had such thoughts and desires and are tired of feeling guilty and ashamed about them, and would rather enjoy, explore or experience them, with someone sane, stable, good fun, good looking, and comfortable with who he is, then I'd love to hear from you. I don't mind if you've always felt this way or are only just just beginning to discover who you are and what you need. If you're happy in who you are, so much the better, but if you're confused, embarassed or a little shy and uncertain about things then I'm equally happy to hear from you and talk with you about them.

If you've got this far then, I can only assume that it's struck a chord with you and so I look forward to hearing from you.

About me - I am 34, tall, white, athletic build, short brown hair, professional with great job, solvent, never married, no kids.
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