I want to be Sexually Assaulted by a woman in public
25th April 2024 - 12:55 | London, London
On the top deck of the bus a young lady in her 30s sits next to me. Two seats right at the front, stairs separate us from other passengers. She’s wearing semi-opaque tights almost an attempt to entice but I think nothing of it. I’m like that. I don’t really care what women are wearing. I’m not a starer. I was never one even before #metoo.
Immediately I notice something is wrong here, she makes me feel uncomfortable, getting right into my territory. Its unusual. Women have a finely attuned sense of space. They'll ALWAYS leave the ‘Gap’ - a cold space between you and themselves, avoiding that spontaneous leg-on-leg touch that would normally happen. Men never do this. They don’t care about space, not with other men nor with women. But this leaves women always second-guessing. Is this guy touching me intentionally? Why is the touch so lingering? Is this guy a creep?
I always leave a Gap. I sometimes wonder if women ever notice that I’m different to other guys. I think many do. I gauge a sense of surprise in them, someone who understands 'the Gap' who isn't them. Most men are totally oblivious of this silent ritual. I’m finely attuned to it. As a weak 5’3 man I know what it feels like having taller, stronger people invading your personal space. Its intimidating and intrusive. But here’s the thing: even most women are taller and stronger than me. I wish they’d invade my personal space more.
Women are finely attuned to personal space, not because they have a particular desire to respect others, but because they’re so protective of their own. When they don’t need to they won’t care; they’ll trample all over you if you’re not visible, the same with dating. They can be quite vicious when they need to be.
On this occasion the lady touches me. I wince. But she carries on. Slowly she starts swinging her leg in a carefree way like little girls do when happy, and doing so I can feel an almost faint ‘push’ each time swings back and forth. I ignore it. She doesn’t stop. Slowly I can feel her leg creeping onto mine and I sense she is smiling. I’m terrified. I ignore it. By the next few stops her leg is practically on top of mine as if I were invisible, as if my personal space was worthless. I’m terrified but being polite and not wanting to cause a scene I ignore it. She’s clearly enjoying this. Invading my personal space in this way while I sit there frozen and powerless. She enjoys the role reversal. A dozen thoughts are going through my mind. Why me? Would she dare do this to a taller, physically stronger guy who’d tell to ‘fuck off?’ I’m disgusted at myself with being weak and not causing a scene. But I don’t know how to handle this without looking silly in front of the other passengers. I get up when my stop arrives. ‘Oh-‘ she says expressing an odd disgust of me not acknowledging what had just gone on.
On the train a girl in her 20s touches my foot. I ignore it. She seems keen and up for it. Up for sexually assaulting a stranger on the train today. I’m not. I ignore her. By setting her foot on me this way it’s a big fuck you. She’s dressed like a Teenage Goth. Black miniskirt and fuck you mesh leggings. A marking of territory. ‘You’re mine today bitch.’ Unlike Bus Lady she is young and bold and doesn’t care about Old People Boundaries. Pure Woman. Fuck Yeah. She starts softly rubbing her leg on me. I ignore it as I do everything. I never see people eye to eye, I prefer staring into space. She likes this and sees it some sort of perverse challenge. She enjoys that this is making me uncomfortable, she can see it on my face. What she enjoys even more is that I’m ignoring it and pretending its not happening. I look up. I see her staring directly at me and smirking. I look away suddenly and for the rest of the journey pretend not to acknowledge her. But she knows I know and it turns her on. Not sexually. In a sort of sadistic way. Its about power. My body is fully turned the other way but she is now intentionally backing straight into me, a full frontal leg-on-leg assault, literally rubbing her legs up and down on me. She’s desperately fishing for a reaction – a look of disgust on my face that would mark her victory. But in the absence of that the fact she has me frozen in fear and is assaulting me in front of other passengers – all seated and unaware – is enough for her. The pure brazenness of her own actions makes her excited - and smug. I leave.
Women don’t do this but I wish they did. I would genuinely be terrified and freeze, that’s the thing. Doesn’t matter the size or age of the lady. I’m a quiet person who tends to ignore strangers. Women do stare at me but my lack of eye contact normally ends their’s. But I wish they'd go one step further and see my lack of eye contact are some sort of weird twisted challenge and sexually assault me as I froze.
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Update 22.09.23
On the District Line my dream kinda came true when a girl started gently backing into me, I posted to my Twitter/X about it as well. However my stupid arm was at such a twisted angle that I had to move away. Another time a few weeks ago a lady was rubbing her head into the back of mine but a guy opposite was staring right at me wondering why I wasn't moving away. FFS why do these sexy incidents always happen at the wrong time?!!
'Phat Ass girl' who called last year on 'Withheld' wanting to get off, my phone battery died and she never called again - same old story lol
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NOTE:
Please no abusive emails telling me I’m a freak. I think differently to most guys that’s all. Please no messages from men saying ‘Wow I feel the same bro.’ Listen that’s truly fantastic but bromance ain't my thing. Also goes without saying - No Gays! ONLY if you’re female who finds this fascinating and would enjoy chatting more get in touch. This is not a personals ad so its not about meeting. However I won’t engage in endless discussions with someone who ends up being another 'bloke-pretending-to-be-a-woman.' After weeks or months of polite conversation finding out its a GUY! I want to avoid that from the start. I'll ask for a clothed body pic next to a note saying 'Saj.' No face needed but enough to know you're actually female. Takes literally a few seconds to do this but if its too much effort then best leave it.
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